your wedding day will not be perfect, and that’s okay
Whether you have been dreaming of your perfect wedding day since childhood or just started thinking about it, one thing is certain: it will not be perfect. And it doesn’t have to be.
There is incredible societal pressure to have the “perfect” wedding. Admit it, you have spent some time on Pinterest ogling over the picture perfect designs, venues, florals, dresses, and more. You close your eye and envision perfection, but perfection is nearly impossible to achieve. You can have a perfectly stunning wedding day, but it will still not be perfect. The weather is unpredictable and uncontrollable. You may have to suddenly pee right before you walk down the aisle. And, let me tell you, peeing in a wedding dress is a talent that takes a crew of incredibly committed friends to carry out. Your best man may forget his dress pants or (gasp) the rings, or you may stumble over your vows. All this, and more, could happen on your wedding day. It isn’t cause for panic because, at the end of the day, it it okay.
It is okay for your wedding day to fall short of perfection
If you are so caught up in creating an unattainable goal, you may miss out on just being in the moment. Stress will take over, and before you realize it, you have completely missed the joy of the day because you were too worried about the small stuff. So much delight and joy comes from simply being in the moment with the ones that you love and cherish. Make the plan, do all the right things to have a great wedding day timeline and flow. But if something does not flow “right,” take a deep breath, look at your new spouse, and appreciate your love, your commitment, and all the wonderful people who showed up to support you.
Enjoy the imperfection
Part of being in the “moment” is learning to enjoy every moment. Even if that moment isn’t exactly what you expected. Looking at the hiccups through a new lens will erase your stress. I encourage my couples to say, “I am thankful for….” When an unexpected comes up, choose gratitude and thankfulness and suddenly, it doesn’t feel as devastating.
Love should be the center of your wedding day
Love, not logistics or material things, should be the center of your wedding day. When my children were growing up, we had a saying in our house, “people are more important than things.” Keep the first things first. Your love for your future spouse, your family, and your friends is more important than anything else. You have found the ONE who fully gets you, the ONE who completes you, the ONE you want to do life with. And all your friends and family are coming together to celebrate that love. Keep that at the center, and your wedding day will be unforgettable.
Focus on perfection in your marriage
None of us will ever attain perfection, but we can strive for it. The most important place to strive for it is in your marriage. After the wedding weekend, you will be learning to walk through life with the love of your life. This person will be by your side for years to come, and you want to live that life well. There will be struggles and trials along the way, but the commitment to loving one another through those struggles will be the glue that bonds you together.
Plan your wedding how you want. Make a statement with all the beautiful elements you want. Make in personal and detailed and gorgeous. But on the wedding day, don’t look for perfection, look for love. Seek opportunities to look at your new spouse and really see them. Take the time to look at your guests and appreciate their love and support. Perfection is a myth, a concept, an ideal that doesn’t exist. Joy, beauty, love, and happiness are real, tangible, and achievable. Put these at the forefront of your wedding celebration!
